I might be like this forever.. I will probably never find it. they’re just never coming back. always in pain.. Alone, lacking the right brain chemicals.. but.. It’s okay. I’m okay. that’s all I’ve ever been after all..
Sorry to anyone actually reading all of this hah. Just needed to physically see my thoughts to straighten them out. I’m alone and it feels like my heart is growing legs to run away from me.
To be fair it would probably be shitty and I would be chubby… or I would have been beaten to death by my brother for fucking a 30 year old. I guess this is the best senario.
I don’t even need a full year, just that one day when I wanted weed and I JUST HAD TO GET OUT OF MY DAMN CAR… What would my life honestly be like if I had just done that one little thing differently?
If I could just rewind my life to exactly one year ago..
Completely alone tonight.
I seriously fucked up.